Harry Potter and the Ridiculous Romance
by magicalmolly
Summary: It's Harry Potter's first year at Hogwarts and already he is struggling with it all. On the bright side, someone is interested, but does Harry like them back?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

The room was cold. Not the temperature cold, the feeling cold. It was cold in a way even his old room hadn't been. The room had a single bed with a metal frame and a hard mattress, a metal chair with a thin cover on the seat – presumably a feeble attempt at comfort – and a closed curtain made of white sheet around one of the bare white corners of the wall. Harry assumed there was a toilet concealed behind it.

Looking around, Harry could see that what made the room cold were the colours. They weren't colours; they were plain and boring attempts to make the room look normal. The room wasn't normal, far from in fact. The memories hit him suddenly and Harry braced himself, ready for the visions to knock him unconscious. You see, this is why Harry was here; the visions.

He knew they weren't visions and that they were memories, but none of it made sense to Harry, even more so the Dursleys. The strange thing about them was that Harry – though the main appearance in his visions – was watching the memories, not living them. He always got the same vision; a sudden flash of green light, a tall beautiful woman falling and a baby, crying in a cot, a scar across his forehead. This scar was how Harry had identified himself as the baby, how he knew the visions weren't visions, they were memories.

Harry sat still in his bed and waited. The vision hit again and this time he was down. He didn't wake again until later, when the lights had turned out and a tray of food and a jug of water had been placed on the floor by the chair.

The tray held bread, ham, cheese, and water.

"It must be Tuesday." Harry muttered to himself. Every day was slightly different, but each week was always the same. Harry had been here for two weeks the next day and this was how he knew what day it was. Every day may have a different food, but it was always the same. He woke up, struggled through a few visions, woke again to breakfast on a tray – two Weetabix and a jug of milk – occasionally went to the toilet behind the curtain and sat on his bed waiting for the next meal or the next vision – whichever came first. So far he hadn't seen anyone, heard anything and hadn't found a door. That was the strange thing about the room; there was no door and no windows. The floor was white, the walls were white and the ceiling was white. The only thing telling Harry he was the right way up was the light on the ceiling.

No matter how hard Harry tried, he could never defeat the visions and stay conscious. This was why he hadn't seen anyone or found the door yet. He was awake, then the vision came and he was unconscious, then he woke and the food was there. It was enough to drive anyone crazy, which was hysterically ironic, because Harry was in a mental asylum.

When Harry woke after a few more visions, something different happened to his usual boring routine. There was a tray, but as well as food and water, there was a person. The man was old and tall. He looked frail and had a white beard and long white hair. His half-moon glasses were perched on the end of his hooked nose. Harry was shocked. He had expected to spend the rest of his life here, doing nothing and knowing nobody. To an eleven year old boy this was something to cry about, but Harry was too proud for that. He would just sit and gaze at nothing instead.

The man was staring at Harry; it was almost as if he was looking straight through him. He moved, the man's eyes followed him. He lifted himself off the bed and sat back down in a more comfortable position. The stranger didn't move or speak for a while. After a few minutes of staring, the man introduced himself.

"My name is Albus Dumbledore. I am a professor and I would like to talk to you, Harry." His voice was slightly croaky with age and he adjusted his glasses as he spoke. He looked tired.

"I suppose they want you to examine my brain and see what's wrong with me, do they?" Harry asked, slightly bitterly. He cringed, he has sounded childish.

"Not at all my boy, I came myself because I would like to help you." He answered. His voice was kind and urged Harry to collaborate.

Harry didn't speak, he wanted more information before he did; he had spotted the camera and microphone in the corner opposite where the toilet was. He knew they would be listening and watching, not knowing who _they_ were of course.

The professor sighed and continued.

"I am from a school Harry; a school for different students… for better students. I heard about you and decided to pay you a visit. We need to talk, but to do that we need to get out of this room because they can hear us."

"But-" Harry started, before the professor cut him off.

"I have arranged for you to leave this room and walk with me, but we only have five minutes. Please, for your own sake, don't interrupt just listen."

Harry decided it was better this way.

When they got back to Harry's room, the door was open. Harry had realised it was a slide door and could only be opened from the outside with a code number. He was stuck.

On the brighter side, he would be leaving soon. The professor was sorting everything out for him.

Harry was leaving the asylum because he needed to go to school. He legally had to. The professor had also loosely explained Harry's visions. The woman was a relative and Harry was the baby. This had all happened and they were memories. He had left it at that with the promise of more information the next time they met.

Their next meeting would be next Sunday when the professor would take Harry to his school. Harry couldn't wait already. He hadn't showered or changed clothes in so long. He really hoped he would get to before the first school day. Harry knew he smelt disgusting.

The professor left and the vision hit him again. It had been record timing between visions – almost an hour!

Harry made it to his bed before he was knocked unconscious and fell into a darker vision than before.

The week dragged on and on the Saturday night Harry woke to a woman in the chair. She was wearing all white and her hair was pulled back tightly, so he knew already that she worked at the asylum. She had come to ask him what he wanted for his last meal and stood to go to the door. The door was opened quickly by someone on the outside and she ran out, the door closed again before Harry could even think about making a bid for freedom. He wouldn't anyway, he was leaving tomorrow.

When the woman returned, she carried the tray in and sat on the chair.

"I love working here." She said. Her voice was harsh and Harry instantly hated her. He was good at picking out people's personalities. Hers was mean, cold and hurtful.

She sighed happily and looked at Harry, smirking.

"I mean, you get to deliver disgusting food to mental people and they don't even know you're there. Who knows what I could've done to the food… or to you even, whilst you were having one of those little nightmares of yours." She scowled and stood. "Anyway, I best be off, plenty more smelly freaks needing slop food."

Then she was gone. Harry was more angry than upset. He was angry at how he had no control over his life. He had gone from the top of the world to the bottom in under a minute, all thanks to one woman he didn't even know.

He sighed and tucked into his sausages and mash. Tomorrow would be better.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Harry woke at exactly midnight. He knew because the door opened at that time and a huge man walked in. He must've been seven feet tall and had a bushy brown beard, not quite as long as professor Dumbledore's had been. His long messy hair matched his beard and looked like it had never seen a brush. He walked in but it sounded like he had stomped.

"Hello, Harry!" He boomed. Harry was surprised the rest of the asylum hadn't been awoken.

"Hello." Harry answered, cautiously. "If you don't mind my asking, who are you?"

"My name is Rubeus Hagrid." The giant replied. "Professor Dumbledore sent me to pick you up for school. He sends his apologies for not picking you up himself, but with the school year starting again tomorrow…" He trailed off, but Harry understood.

He got up from his bed and walked over to the chair where Hagrid was stood. He had to crouch in the small room.

"Lovely place you got here, Harry." He said, laughing.

Harry laughed with him. Hagrid was nice enough and friendly. Harry liked him.

"So, how long had you been there then?" asked Hagrid. They were walking through London, Harry slightly behind so he could follow Hagrid but still talk to him.

"Almost three weeks." replied Harry. He had no idea where they were headed, but followed anyway.

"Well! You must've been bored out of your mind." Hagrid looked horrified. "Turn here." He added.

They were facing an old shop with scary looking mannequins in the window. It had a sign in the window saying it was closed for refurbishment. Harry wondered how long the sign had been there.

They turned again and Hagrid lead Harry towards a rundown pub. The sign said its name was _The Leaky Cauldron_. Hagrid opened the door and Harry followed. The room was completely empty except for the barman. He said hello to Hagrid and just stared at Harry in awe. It unnerved him a bit.

They went out of the back door and Hagrid stopped, Harry almost crashing into the back of him. When Harry got around Hagrid he could see why they had stopped. They were facing a brick wall. The only way out of the brick enclosure was the way they had come or by climbing, but the walls were too high for that.

Harry was about to ask Hagrid what they were doing when he got out an old pink umbrella and tapped some of the bricks in what looked like a random order. Harry was shocked when the wall started to ripple and a hole started to appear in the centre of the wall. Hagrid climbed through so Harry followed.

"Now Harry, welcome to Diagon Ally. I assume Professor Dumbledore told you about you being Magic and all…" Hagrid looked at him expectantly.

Harry shook his head, completely speechless.

"Oh, well no matter, you know now… I bet that explains a few things eh?" Hagrid chuckled and Harry smiled meekly.

They walked down the busy street together until they reached an enormous marble building. It was called _Gringotts_ and appeared to be a bank.

"Now, your mum and dad left you a small fortune, I've heard." said Hagrid, glancing at Harry before stepping up the polished marble steps three at a time.

"I don't have parents." Was all Harry could say.

"Of course you do!" Hagrid boomed again, "Everybody has parents, some poor souls were just a bit unfortunate, is all." Hagrid said, more gently now.

They entered the building and Harry was in awe again. The polished oak panelled floor stretched for what seemed like miles, crystal chandeliers hung from the tall ceiling. The room was tall enough to fit a hundred Hagrids stood on top of each other. Down each side of the room there were goblins sat behind polished oak desks, looking down at the other witches and wizards.

They walked right down to the very end of the room to a particularly high desk. The ugly looking goblin looked down his nose at them and frowned.

"Harry Potter collecting his coins." Said Hagrid looking equally as disgusted.

"Does Mr Potter have his key?" The goblin answered, grinning evilly when Hagrid looked shocked.

"I have it here somewhere…Its right here…I swear I put it…" Hagrid said whilst shuffling through his coat pockets. "Ah! Here we go!" He placed the small key on the desk.

The goblin frowned again. Number 687." He said, turning away already.

Hagrid didn't thank the goblin, he just turned on his heel and followed a different goblin to a big archway with mining carts on a track. Hagrid climbed in and Harry copied. The goblin pushed a lever and the cart shot away from the big beautiful room and down into a huge void. The cart felt like it was going at a hundred mile an hour and Harry treated it like a theme park ride. Eventually, after about twenty loops and sudden drops and turns, they slowed slightly and passed a vault with ten or fifteen goblins crowding round it. The number was 713. They stopped and the goblins ran off, going back to their business. Hagrid climbed out and looked at Harry apologetically.

"Sorry Harry, got to pick up something for professor Dumbledore." He said, then turned back to the vault.

When he had opened the door he pulled out a small parcel, leaving the vault empty and put it in his inside pocket. He then clambered back into the cart and they were off again. A few minutes later they were outside Harry's vault and getting out. Hagrid opened Harry's vault door for him and Harry almost fainted. There must've been a million pounds in there.

"Now Harry, we only need about a hundred galleons maybe?" Hagrid said.

"Wait, what are galleons?" Asked Harry, confused.

"Well you've got your galleons, sickles and knuts. There are seventeen sickles in a galleon and 29 Knuts in a sickle, so there are 493 Knuts in a galleon. The galleons are the gold ones, the sickles are the silver ones and the Knuts are the bronze ones."

"Right, I think I get it…" Said Harry, trying to remember everything.

He took a hundred galleons out and twenty sickles. Then he took out fifty Knuts, just in case. Then Hagrid closed and locked the vault, gave Harry his key and they both climbed back into the cart where the goblin was waiting to take them back.

Harry sat back to enjoy the ride and smiled for what felt like the first time in forever.

When they left the bank, Hagrid gave Harry a list of books and told him to go get them from the book shop whilst Hagrid got the potions ingredients for him. Harry walked into the shop and looked around, almost crashing into the huge piles and stacks of books. They were piled on top of each other, leaving only a small pathway to the counter and between stacks. He found his books and took them to the counter. The man behind the counter just stared for a minute, the appeared to wake up from a trance and gave Harry his books, taking the coins Harry handed over. He got most of the calculations right.

Then Harry wondered over to the wand shop where he could see Hagrid waiting. The shop was dark and looked dusty and gloomy, which was strange because it was the only wand shop in Diagon Ally so it was probably quite popular. The shop was called _Ollivander's_.

Hagrid said he needed to go get something from a different shop, but Harry would be better off going in on his own anyway. Harry pushed the door open and wandered over to the counter. An old looking man was behind the counter, waiting for Harry to reach him.

"Harry Potter." Was all he said. Harry wondered how he knew his name. "I was wondering when I would see you." He continued, "Let me take your measurements."

Then he got out a tape measure and measured the lengths of Harry's arms and full body and around his stomach. When he had finished, he went back behind the counter and brought out a box. It was long and rectangular. Harry strongly suspected there was a wand inside.

"Go on then, boy." He said, holding the box out for Harry to take.

Harry took the box and removed the lid. He picked up the wand and held it. Well, he held it until it exploded a few other wands off the wall. Ollivander took the wand back, sighing. He put it back in the box and picked the other boxes up. Then he took a different box and opened it. He looked to be thinking hard as he removed the wand and placed it in Harry's hand. It seemed to glow slightly and nothing else happened.

"Ah. I wondered about that wand for you Mr Potter. The wand chooses the wizard Harry. That is made of Holly wood and has a Phoenix Feather core. Eleven inches."

Harry paid for the wand and thanked Ollivander, then left the shop to find Hagrid. It didn't take long as he was right outside.

"I couldn't come in with this." He said and held out a snowy white owl for Harry to see. "I got her for you, as a birthday present." Harry had forgotten it was his birthday. He took the owl from Hagrid.

"Thanks Hagrid." He said, giving Hagrid a hug. His arms barely fit round him.

"Now, what time is your train?"


End file.
